Chapter 10: Mothers

For Kaci, my second set of eyes
When the moon at full on the sill of heaven
Lights her beacon, flooding the earth with silver,
All the shining stars that about her cluster
Hide their fair faces;

So when Anactoria's beauty dazzles
Sight of mine, grown dim with the joy it gives me,
Gorgo, Atthis, Gyrinno, all the others
Fade from my vision.
Sappho

She seemed out of place in the sterile, white cinder-blocked attorney conference room. She was an older, somewhat frumpy woman dressed in a disheveled blue business suit, looking more like a harried middle school teacher than a criminal defense attorney. Her expression said she wished she were somewhere else. Anywhere else.

She opened her briefcase, rummaged through it until she found the folder she wanted.

At last, the inmate access door opened, and a scraggly, thin, toothless woman in an orange inmate jumpsuit was led in. She was not happy. “Will you take these fucking things off,” she snapped at the corrections officer, indicating the handcuffs securing her wrists.

The CO, a burly young man, did just that, and the woman flexed her wrists. “Behave yourself sunshine,” he said with a grin, “Or it’s back to your cell.”

“Yeah, fuck you! Kiss my ass!”

The CO stepped out of the room, and the lawyer motioned for the woman to sit down. “You my fucking lawyer?” the woman growled.

“I’m Denise Ashton, and I am in fact your court appointed attorney. Just for the record, you are Sandra Harper?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“May I call you Sandra?”

“Whatever.”

“OK Sandra,” Ashton said, looking down at the documents. “You’ve been charged with some pretty serious crimes.”

“Yeah, it’s all fucking bullshit, cops tryin’ to harass me.”

“Uh, no Sandra, these are not harassment charges, these are serious, go-to-prison charges. You need to face that reality very quickly.”

“When the fuck am I gettin’ outta here?”

“Sandra, let’s focus on the stuff that matters first. Your charges. Let me review them for you. Possession with intent to distribute a Schedule 1 narcotic – heroin.” Sandra started to protest, but Ashton held up her hand. “Listen, then we’ll discuss. Possession with intent to distribute Class 2 narcotics – cocaine, oxycodone, and methamphetamine. One count of elevated, aggravated domestic violence assault, aggravated because the alleged victim is under 14.”

“That fuckin’ cunt daughter of mine,” Sandra snarled.

“Ssshhh, relax. Listen. Resisting detention by force. Assault on a police officer. Taken in total, these are very, very serious charges. I see from the record that you’ve dealt with various misdemeanors before. These, my friend, are not misdemeanor charges. They are very serious felony charges. The potential is there for you to go to the state prison for 30 years. And if you want to look at a really bad – but definitely possible – scenario, those drug charges could be turned over the Feds, where you’d be facing 30 years in a Federal prison. So, it’s in your best interest to listen. And cooperate with me. Am I getting through to you?”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Sandra said dismissively. She’d gotten out of legal scrapes before with no real trouble. There was no reason to assume she wouldn’t this time. Unless it was murder, the system was pretty much an assembly line recycling the same people over and over. “When the fuck am I getting’ outta here?” she said again with growing irritation.

Ashton shook her head in frustration. Cooperation was going to be hard to come by. “Sandra, your bail right now is $50,000 – outrageous, true, but a sign that they are taking this very! seriously! And you need to do the same. Now you have an arraignment and a bail hearing next Wednesday. At that time, the charges will be formally read, and you’ll plead not guilty. Then I’ll argue for a bail reduction, which you’ll almost certainly get. $50,000 is outrageous. If I can get it below $5,000, I will be very surprised. So, after next Wednesday, you’ll get out if you can find someone with $5,000 they’ll risk on you.”

“What? What the fuck is up with that shit?” Sandra cried. “That’s fuckin’ bullshit!”

“That’s fucking reality, Sandra!” Ashton said sternly, her eyes glowing. God, how she hated dealing with the dregs of society like this woman.

Hearing an attorney swear in a raised voice was sobering to Sandra. Somewhat. “OK, so then what? No bail, then what?”

“You stay right here until someone does bail you, or you go to trial. And you’re not going to trial. You go to trial, you are guaranteed a long prison term, because no jury on earth is going to buy whatever sob story you offer in defense. Now, speaking of sob stories, tell me your version of what went on so I can get to work on figuring out what we are going to do.”

Sandra scowled. “It’s all that no good cunt daughter of mine’s fault, the rotten bitch! I shoulda had a fuckin’ abortion, by Jesus! She thinks she’s so fuckin’ high and goddamn mighty, twitch her little ass and get what she wants. Well not in my house, that fuckin’ shit don’t fly, no fuckin’ way.”

Ashton thought briefly it was a damned good thing Sandra wasn’t talking to someone from the DA’s office just then. “Let’s not worry about what you think about your daughter. What happened?”

“Me and my boyfriend Gerry was sittin’ up in the apartment, mindin’ our own business, drinkin’ some beers, an’ watchin’ TV. Then, that cunt daughter of mine comes waltzin’ in, just as big as Billy be damned, and she goes, ‘I need some oxys Gerry, you got some?’ An’ he goes, ‘Nah, I ain’t got any of that shit, you know I don’t do that stuff.’ And the little fuckface goes, ‘To hell you don’t, I know you do.’ An’ next thing I know, some bitch come blastin’ through the door, and she’s like, got a baseball bat, an’ Gerry, he jumps up and tries to get the bitch to leave, but she starts whalin’ away, beatin’ the shit outta him, I mean he’s a tough guy, but fuck! a baseball bat? So Laci the cunt, she’s kickin’ on him, sayin’ ’Where’s the oxy?’ An’ the bitch stove in his face ‘fore I got a knife and run them off. I was so worried about Gerry, I couldn’t even call 911.”

“So what about the drugs the police saw in plain sight?”

“Bull shit! They planted that shit! There weren’t no fuckin’ drugs in that house! None!”

“What about reports that your boyfriend hurt himself by falling and hitting his face on the banister? The blood all over that banister?”

“What of it? Maybe she didn’t bash in his face, maybe it happened when he was chasin’ her out and he tripped. I didn’t see real clear.”

Ashton sighed and rubbed her temples. This is what it was all reduced to, all the high hopes and idealism of law school, down to representing the scum of the earth for minimum wage, trying to free people who belonged in prison.

“OK Sandra,” Ashton said. “That’s all I need for now. If I have questions, we’ll meet here again. Otherwise, I’ll see you in court on Wednesday morning.”


Snow, Karen thought, looking out the breakfast nook window. This had to be the snowiest winter she’d ever experienced, and it still wasn’t mid-February. Now it was snowing again. Hard. She looked at Gail and shook her head slowly. “We’re going to be digging out of this shit in June. How are the roads?”

Gail stared down at her coffee cup. “Crappy. You drive a frigging 10,000 pound tank, you have no right to worry about the roads.”

Karen chuckled. “What time’s that CPS woman supposed to be here?”

Gail sighed. “Nine thirty. And she will be here on time, shitty roads or not.”

Karen glanced at her watch. “Plenty of time for a cigarette. Come out on the deck with me?”

Gail pushed her chair back. “Why not… see the pretty snow,” Gail said in a sarcastic sing-song voice.

“Laci,” Karen called, moving toward the dining room. “Honey, I’m going out on the deck to have a cigarette, OK?”

“OK,” Laci called back.

Karen and Gail stepped out onto the deck, an overhang providing them with cover. Karen took out a cigarette, and Gail suddenly said, “Gimme one.”

“What?” Karen said, taken aback.

“You heard me. Gimme a cigarette woman.”

“You’re not drunk. Or did you knock back a few before you came out here.” She gave Gail a cigarette.

“I’m a big girl. I can smoke a cigarette sober if I want to.” Gail had had no idea how she was going to feel when she stepped through the door and saw them. Please don’t let me see them kiss, she prayed to a god unknown. Hugs I can handle, but not kisses, that’ll be a knife to my heart.

Gail accepted a light and took a deep drag. She’d quit smoking her last year of law school, when it was time to get serious and put the party days behind her. Now, she only smoked after she got half a dozen drinks under her belt. However, today was… not ordinary.

“Gail,” Karen said. “There’s a 700 pound gorilla in the room, and we both see it…”

“Karen, please,” Gail cut her off. “I’m in an OK place right now. Not great, but OK. Don’t pull me out of it. Just…”

“Just what?”

Gail took another deep hit from her cigarette. “Just don’t kiss her in front of me. I can handle hugs, but not kisses.”

“OK,” Karen said with a puzzled frown. “I hadn’t planned on kissing her in front of you or anyone else.”

“I’m just saying something like that would make me useless to you. You’re lucky I didn’t go out and get commode hugging drunk last night.”

“Gail, why don’t you have a girlfriend? You’re a beautiful woman, you’re sexy, you’re well-off, you’re…”

“For starters, an insufferable bitch, short-tempered, impatient, a workaholic, stubborn…”

“Oh for Christ’s sake Gail! All that’s bullshit and you know it.”

“Karen, this is a path I don’t want to go down right now. Let’s go in and finish our coffee before I freeze. I don’t have meat on my bones in case you haven’t noticed. Then I want to talk to Laci for a minute or two before Nancy gets here.”

Laci sat at the dining room table, her knees drawn up, and her hair spilling around her face. She had her sketchbook and the box of colored pencils opened, and she was focused on what she was drawing. She’d thought about doing a sketch of Karen, but she didn’t think could do it properly just yet, and she didn’t want to do it until she could do it right. Karen deserved better than that. Instead, the Teddy bear sat next to her as a model, and she patiently sketched it out.

Laci was mildly surprised that working on a sketch really did distract her, focus her attention, and give her pleasure. It also surprised her how naturally it came to her, and truth be told, it looked pretty good.

When Karen called out that she was going on the deck with Gail to have a cigarette, Laci straightened and stretched like a cat waking from a nap. She pushed her hair back from her face, wondering vaguely whether she ought to put it in a pony-tail. A stronger thought intruded. What were Karen and Gail talking about on the deck? Laci knew something had gone on between them yesterday, something she wasn’t privy to, and that filled her with anxiety. Then this morning, she noticed Gail was very subdued, even a little sad.

Laci shook her head and refocused on her drawing. It was bad enough having to worry about the welfare department lady coming to talk to them and inspect the place; she didn’t need to get worked up about Karen and Gail. She knew Karen loved her, not Gail – that much was certain – so it was foolish to worry about what might or might not be going on between them.

Laci studied the bear. It wore a threadbare pink ribbon around it’s neck as a scarf, and a pink t-shirt with a small heart embroidered over where the bear’s own heart must be. She took it in and turned back to her sketch. The pencil made a soft scuffing sound as she drew it back and forth over the coarse sketch pad, and with each stroke, the bear came closer to life on the paper.

The girls at school would probably tease her relentlessly if they knew she had a Teddy bear she liked to hold when she was stressed. It was the nature of things that those same girls probably had their own secret bears, or dolls, or some such talisman. The bear didn’t have its own real name yet. For lack of anything better, Laci called her Paddington. (In Laci’s mind, the bear was unquestionably female.)

She put the regular pencil down and picked up a pink one. Just as she started sketching again, she became aware that Karen and Gail had come into the room. Karen came behind Laci and put her hands on the girl’s shoulders. “Lost in space, sweetie?” she smiled.

Laci smiled up at her. “I was just drawing the bear and didn’t hear you come in.”

Karen glanced at the drawing. “Wow,” she enthused, “That’s amazing baby! Gail, take a look. Didn’t I tell you she was talented?”

Gail looked over and nodded her head, impressed. “That is pretty amazing. I think it’s something we want Nancy to see.”

Gail sat down in the chair next to Laci. “Laci, honey,” she said softly. “I want to go over some things with you. No, don’t worry, it’s not a bunch of last minute stuff you have to memorize.” Gail covered Laci’s hands with her own.

She looked directly at Laci and said, “First, it’s important for you to be polite, OK? You don’t have to be friendly, just polite. Most of the kids she deals with are rude, crude, and pissed off at the world. They either give her grief or don’t talk at all. If you’re polite and you answer her questions, it can only reflect good on you and Karen, OK? Good.

“Now being polite doesn’t mean you have to be talkative. When she asks a question, just answer the question, no more. For example, if she asks what your favorite color is, say ‘Pink,’ not ‘Pink, but sometimes I like blue, and other times yellow.’ Don’t volunteer stuff, OK?”

Laci reached over and grabbed the bear. She nodded. “I understand.”

They looked at each other closely, steadily. There was something in those eyes, in that face, that told Gail this girl wasn’t as helpless and naïve as she first appeared. A lifetime living in the cesspool that was Laci’s world would do that to a girl. “She’s going to want to talk to you alone at some point. Same rules, polite but don’t volunteer information. And you can – probably should – keep the bear with you, OK?”

Laci nodded. “I just wish it was over.”

“Soon honey. I really don’t think you have anything to worry about.”

Before Laci could answer, the doorbell rang.

She was a rotund little woman, with neatly styled short hair, who looked oddly elfin in her winter coat, scarf, and wool hat. A line from a television commercial for a toy from her childhood popped into Karen’s head: “Weebles wobble but the don’t fall down.” The woman held out a laminated badge. “Ms. Nelson? I’m Nancy Mathieu from Child Protective Services.”

“Get in here before you freeze to death,” Karen said stepping aside.

“Oh, thank you, it is nasty out there.”

“Let me take your coat and scarf,” Karen said, helping Mathieu with her outerwear and her briefcase. “You can put your boots where the others are. I didn’t know what size shoe you wore, so I found a pair of one-size-fits-all scuffies for you.” She pointed at a pair of bland, well-worn slippers.

“Oh my,” Mathieu said. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Well, I figured your feet might like to warm up a bit.”

“Thank you, ma’am.’

Mathieu looked up and spied Gail. Her eyes lit up. “Gail! What are you doing here? I wasn’t expecting you. Personal or professional?”

Gail held her hand out. “Hi Nancy. A little of both. Karen and I are old friends, and I’ve represented her in the past. When circumstances started to go south, she naturally gave me a call for some… advice. Karen, Nancy and I have worked cases together in the past, so we know each other reasonably well.”

Karen knew this, but she understood Gail’s purpose in repeating it. “That might make things a little easier.”

“Ms. Nelson,” Mathieu said a bit more formally. “I presume you know why I’m here. To evaluate the living arrangements for Laci Harper, so we can come up with a plan to ensure her best interests.”

Karen nodded. “Yes, I’m aware of that.”

“Can I meet Laci?”

“Absolutely. I believe she’s in the dining room working on a project.” Karen led them into the dining room. “Laci? Honey, this is Ms. Mathieu, the lady from Child Protective Services Gail told you about.”

Laci took a deep breath and stood up, automatically offering her hand. The moments when she faced her interrogators were the worst. It felt as if her entire future hung on her giving a correct answer to any number of rigged questions, like high-wire walker performing without a net on a subtly jiggling line. The lady seemed nice enough, but she was from the state, so like the cops she couldn’t really be trusted no matter how nice she looked. Laci squirmed uncomfortably and tugged at the bear, waiting for the inquisition to begin.

To Laci’s eternal amazement, the whole ordeal was relatively brief. The state lady introduced herself, and asked if it was OK for Laci to show her her room… alone. Karen didn’t object, so Laci led the lady upstairs to the room they’d set up as hers. Karen had had her make the room look lived in by tossing some clothes over the back of the chair, and scattering some of her school books over the desktop.

Mathieu looked around and nodded. She casually asked Laci, “Is this where you do your homework, dear?”

“No,” Laci said simply.

“Where do you do it?”

“Downstairs in the dining room so Karen can help me when I need it.”

“Does she help you?”

“Oh yeah, all the time, ‘specially with math, which I have a hard time getting.”

“You don’t like math, I take it. What are your favorite classes?”

“Art. And English. I like to draw and read, and Karen says I ought to start keeping a journal.”

Mathieu looked in the closet, where a decent sized wardrobe hung neatly on hangers. “Nice and neat. Does Ms. Nelson do that?”

“No, I do. I’m not a slob, I like things neat, I hate messes. My — mother’s — my old apartment was a fricken disgusting dump.” Laci shuddered at the memory. “It was just gross.”

“Who does the laundry? You?”

“Usually Karen, but I help her fold and stuff.”

“Laci, don’t take this the wrong way, but has Ms. Nelson ever touched you in a way that made you uncomfortable?”

This was not an unexpected question. Karen hadn’t brought it up, except when she admonished Laci not to talk about what they did in private, but the girl was smart enough to know it was coming. Her insides clenched unpleasantly. “What?” she said as though surprised. “You mean like pervo touch? Uh, no, not hardly.” She gave the bear an extra hard squeeze, but otherwise looked right at Mathieu.

Mathieu nodded. It was not lost on her that most kids Laci’s age and in her position, were rude, defensive, uncommunicative, or downright hostile. Laci seemed genuinely polite and respectful, and while not a chatterbox, she didn’t shy away from offering answers.

Laci didn’t let her guard down after The Question. Nothing that had happened since the Bad Night had done anything to disabuse her of her natural wariness of people in authority. They had agendas, and they weren’t revealing those agendas.

Once the room was inspected, and Mathieu poked her head into the bathroom, it seemed as if that would be the extent of the interrogation. Laci led the woman back downstairs to Karen and Gail. From there, everything seemed directed at Karen. Laci instinctively understood she was supposed to stay behind while Karen brought Mathieu on a tour of the rest of the house.

Mathieu inspected the refrigerator, freezer, and cupboards. She checked the smoke and carbon monoxide detectors, and she asked Karen questions about her finances, health insurance, and community involvement. Once they’d looped back to the dining room, just under an hour had passed since Mathieu rang the doorbell.

Mathieu glanced out the window at the unrelenting snow with ill-concealed anxiety. “Well,” she said with a small smile. “I think I’ve seen all I need to see. I can’t see where any great purpose would be served by changing such a mutually agreeable situation. Laci, you seem very content, Ms. Nelson, you seem more than willing and able to provide for Laci’s needs, it seems like a very nurturing environment. I’ll write up a report with my findings and recommendations before the day is through. Gail, I’ll leave it up to you to file a petition with Probate for a formal custody hearing. The sooner the better.”

“Yes Nancy,” Gail smiled. “I know the drill.”

“Are you going to be able to get out of the driveway and on the road OK?” Karen asked anxiously.

“Oh, I’ll be fine.” 

They watched Mathieu troop through the snow and get in her car. “So what now?” Karen said to Gail, while slipping her arm around Laci’s shoulder.

“’What now’, is a hearing before the county Probate Judge. I’ll need to get hold of his office today and arrange the hearing… say for Monday afternoon with any luck. That should be just a formality. With the state not raising any objections – they have bigger fish to fry and only so much money to fry those fish — you’re Laci’s de facto guardian ad litem. The probate hearing will basically just formalize what’s already an accomplished fact. Look, I have to get back to town myself. I’ll call you with the dates and times this evening. And look, guys — Don’t worry.”

Once Gail was bundled up, Karen said, “Be careful, babe. I can give you a ride into town in the SUV.”

“No Karen, I’ll be fine, I know how to drive in snow.”

Gail held her gloved hand for Laci, but much to the woman’s surprise, Laci put her hands on Gail’s waist and lifted her face to plant a kiss on the lawyer’s cheek. Then she hugged Gail, and murmured with quiet force, “Thank you, Gail. Thank you.”

Gail regained her wits and hugged Laci back. “You’re very welcome sweetie.”

Laci’s sudden action caught Karen off guard. What the… that came out of left field. It appeared Laci still had plenty of pleasant surprises up her sleeve.


It was clear to Karen that Laci was becoming more frazzled every day the process played out. And why wouldn’t she? Damn near raped and murdered to start the week, then relentlessly hounded by strangers demanding the wounds be reopened and picked and poked at over and over. Was it any wonder the girl was especially clingy and needy?

Once they were alone, Karen led Laci up to the bedroom. It was a good time to lay down and maybe take a nap. Karen opened a two-hour loop of Bach chamber music, something soothing. She kicked off her slippers, took off her top and bra, and lay down, pulling up the neatly folded comforter from the foot of the bed. Laci mimicked Karen, removing her top and bra. Karen held up the blanket so Laci could get under and snuggle up. Karen pulled her even closer. “I love having you right up against me.”

Laci burrowed in, nuzzling her face in the crook of Karen’s neck. “You’re so warm,” she whispered. Laci silently marveled that such simple pleasures as cuddling with someone who loved you and you loved back really existed. Karen rocked her. “Karen?” she asked innocently. “Are we in love?”

It was a completely ingenuous question, guileless and free of anything but naïve innocence. Karen wasn’t surprised anymore that Laci took nothing for granted, so she didn’t minimize the question. “Well honey, I’m sure in love with you.”

“An’ I’m love with you. So I guess that means we are in love,” the girl murmured. “I never thought I’d be in love, really in love. So in love sometimes I wanna explode. But I am now.”

Everyone else in Laci’s life faded to insignificance when she was alone with Karen like this. “Karen? How many more times do I hafta talk to people about — everything? Keep going over it and over it? When will people leave me alone about it?”

Karen smiled ruefully. “Not much more. You’ve been awesome during all this, kitten. I am so proud of you, you have been amazing. I know its very hard, and I can’t always be there to make you feel better, but you have been so incredibly brave and strong.” Their eyes were locked. “I am just so proud of you and how special you are. Not many girls could be as mature and strong as you’ve been.”

Laci blushed. Karen’s praise was real, and it made Laci’s heart speed up. She shrugged. “I just get tired of it, and I’m always so afraid I’m going to say something that’s going to make them take us apart, an’ I just wanna stop worrying and just be with you and be your…”

“The love of my life. My baby.”

Laci nodded. “Your baby.”

Karen toyed with Laci’s ponytail. She knew her breast beckoned the girl. Smiling, she traced her fingers over the nape of Laci’s neck, and over her jaw line to her lips. She dipped her head to kiss Laci softly. “I think I know what you’d like,” she whispered, and she exposed her breast.

Laci’s heart sped up and her breathing quickened. Karen’s nipple was already long and erect. “You don’t think I’m weird do you?” Laci said almost in a whisper. “For liking to do that so much?”

Karen smiled at her, then kissed her again. “No, I don’t think you’re weird. I like it, too – a lot.” And she lifted her breast in invitation.

Laci nuzzled in, moaning ever so softly. She drew Karen’s nipple into her mouth and used her tongue to nudge and massage the firm bud. Karen closed her eyes and sighed. The way Laci used her tongue to press Karen’s nipple up against the roof of her mouth sent tickly thrills over the woman. Laci began nursing, and her suckling and little nips made it feel like Karen’s gems were attached to a cord running directly to some deep, secret inner pleasure spot.

Laci’s body grew tingly and warm. How did Karen always seem to know when this was exactly what she needed? She seemed to understand that Laci craved this small form of loving, and oh it was so calming. It made her feel so safe and warm, and so close to Karen.

As her lover settled in to a nursing rhythm, Karen stroked Laci’s hip through her leggings. “My beautiful baby girl, you make Mummy Karen feel so good, you make me so happy, you are my special girl, so beautiful, so smart, so brave, everything I ever wanted in a baby girl.” She drew her fingers over the front of Laci’s pants, stroked down and teased the girl’s muffin through the layers of fabric. She almost unconsciously began humming, then singing the Teddy Bear lullaby.

Karen’s words of love and praise, and then her singing Laci’s favorite lullaby song relaxed the girl. On the other hand, Karen’s gentle brushes of Laci’s mound awakened her sexual hunger. She moved her hips restlessly. She sensed too that her nursing was exciting Karen in a sexual way. She paused in her suckling only when she’d built up a mouthful of saliva and she needed to swallow it, pretending it was a mouthful of milk.

There was another thought swirling through Laci’s head, one so profound she hardly dared think of it, yet so amazing if it were true. Perhaps now was a good time to ask it since they were pretending about baby milk and nursing. She momentarily released Karen’s breast. “Karen, Gail said something yesterday, I’m not sure I heard it right.”

Karen grimaced, thinking the worst. “What did she say, honey?”

“I think she said that if my mother is told she can’t, like, be my mother anymore – you know, that terminate thing she talked about – then you would have to adopt me for me to stay with you. Is that true?”

Karen’s relaxed. “That’s how it’s supposed to work, at least as far as I understand it.”

“So that would mean you’d, like, be my new real mother?”

“I suppose you could put it that way.”

“Would that mean we couldn’t, you know, love anymore?”

“Not to me it wouldn’t. Even if it did though, as long as I had you with me, I’d manage. I love you, not the sex. But let’s not fret over stuff like this. It’s way off in the future and we have other things to get through first.”

Laci’s heart pounded in her chest. Having Karen for a real mother was something that was too overwhelming to even contemplate. She found Karen’s breast and resumed nursing. She looked up at Karen and a two-fisted pang shot through her. Her feelings for Karen at that moment bordered on worship. How was it possible, she wondered, to feel so strongly about someone and not explode?

A warm tightening settled on Laci’s chest and tummy. She was consumed by an urgent desire to give love to her adored mother-lover.

Laci saw that Karen’s eyes were dreamy. She seemed to be absorbed by the music wafting from the speakers. Laci didn’t know what it was, just some more beautiful Karen Music. It sounded nice – sensuous and warm, just how she felt.

Still nursing, Laci eased a hand between their bodies to Karen’s tummy. Karen didn’t object. She simply caressed Laci’s temple and purred softly, “You’re my baby, you’re my love, you’re so beautiful.”

Karen felt her pelvis tensing up and knotting deliciously as Laci slowly worked her hand closer. Laci released Karen’s red, swollen nipple, and a thin, viscous strand of saliva temporarily connected them. Karen was breathing hard through parted lips, and her eyes were becoming glazed. Without consciously thinking about it, they teamed up to work Karen’s leggings off, then Laci did the same with hers, finally using her feet to push the garments to the foot of the bed.

 Laci lifted her sweet mouth to Karen’s, and as she did, she began probing Karen’s mound with the tips of her fingers. Karen sighed, then rolled onto her back. She bent her knees to keep the covers tented.

Laci pounced on Karen’s mouth and greedily worked her tongue over Karen’s lips. Karen took the girl’s face in her hands and held her close. With their tongue tips dancing, Laci slid her delicate hand confidently over the full curve of Karen’s vulva. She pushed forward until the pad of her middle finger tickled Karen’s anal rosebud. Karen yipped and jumped, and Laci smiled with delight.

Laci drew her finger up and nudged it between Karen’s sticky wet labia and stroked it up and down, up and down, each time a little harder. Karen’s eyes rolled and she groaned softly, “Ooooohhhh my.” Laci smiled broadly. Oh how she loved pleasuring Karen!

It didn’t take long for Laci to work Karen into a frothy soup. She stroked her hand from Karen’s anal rosebud, to the entrance of her juicy pussy, up her labial sleeve, to her tumescent clit, and back down. Karen was rocking her hips and making soft mumury sounds.

Laci savored Karen’s heat, her soaking wetness, the silky softness of her sex as she skated her fingers over it, but she wanted more. Without thinking about it, she straightened up and tossed the blankets aside.

“Laci honey, what’re you doing sweetie?”

Laci gave her a puckish smile. “I wanna kiss your pussy and make you come that way.”

Karen laughed. “I love it when you talk naughty like that.”

Her face still glowing with the puckish smile, she looked down at her lover. She pushed Karen’s legs apart, exposing her sex. “Pussy. Cunt,” she purred naughtily.

Karen, her arms thrown above her head, offered herself to her girl-lover. “Oh you are so bad, such a naughty muffin.” Her vulva glistened, her labia parted to expose her vagina, she murmured, “I guess that means you have big plans for me, huh?”

“Oh yes!” Laci nodded enthusiastically. “I sure do,” and she lowered herself to her elbows. She breathed in Karen’s heady, earthy aroma, and drank in the beauty of Karen’s treasure trove. Karen was completely open and accessible from her anal bud to her swollen clit. Laci hardly knew where to start. She urgently wanted to make Karen squirm and moan, she wanted to taste her lover, feel her heat, hear the music of her passion.

Laci hesitated, but then tickled the tip of her tongue over the convoluted fissures of Karen’s asshole. Karen drew in a sharp breath, then reached down to pull her legs back. Laci thrilled at the pleasure she sent rippling over Karen. She gave a long, slow lap with the flat of her tongue from Karen’s anal rosebud up, up, up, over her vaginal entrance, up the exposed sleeve of her labia, up to her clit. She pointed her tongue and poked it at Karen’s clit nest. Karen swirled her hips and moaned, “Oooohhhh yessssss.”

Laci corkscrewed two fingers into Karen’s warm, tight, juicy pussy hole, releasing a stream of her elixir. Laci worked her tongue deliberately, firmly over Karen’s tumescent jewel, moaning softly as she did. Karen’s taste, the music of her sighs and coos, the feel of her lover’s clit under her tongue, brought Laci to a wonderful and warm place. I am the luckiest girl in the whole world, and I make her feel so good, me, not someone else, she loves me, how can anybody be luckier, because I love her and she loves me…

The ambrosia from Karen’s vagina trickled down the seam between her two holes, bathing her rosebud. Laci lifted her head and a thick strand of saliva stretched from her lip to Karen’s clit. She quickly slid her face down and reached out to touch Karen’s puckered ass with her tongue. She tickled it, and Karen jumped and let out a sharp cry. “Laci baby!” she panted. “Ooohhhh my sweet baby! My precious girl, my love, my love.”

Laci marveled at the rough intricacies of Karen asshole, the way it quivered when she touched it. I wonder what would happen if I put my finger in there? Would she like it? It felt good when she did it to me, who woulda thought playing with your butt could feel good.

Without dwelling on it, Laci repositioned herself, wet her finger with spit, and gently pushed it passed Karen’s anal sphincter into her rectal vault. Karen jumped again, and cried out louder this time. Her butt muscles clamped involuntarily, then relaxed. “Is that OK?” Laci asked anxiously.

Still panting, Karen reassured the girl. “Yes baby. Yes, it’s nice. Very nice.”

Laci was enchanted by this wondrous part of her lover. It was like she’d dipped her finger in a jar of heated jelly. Still wriggling her finger in Karen’s ass, she dropped her face back to the woman’s beckoning sex as gracefully as she could. She clamped her lips over Karen’s clit.

Karen tugged and tweaked her nipples, letting her body dance to the musical rhythm of Laci’s tongue strokes. “That’s it baby girl, oh yes, oh yes, so good, my precious baby, my love, oh my love.” Her moans grew louder and more impassioned, her gyrations ever more urgent.

Laci rattled her tongue over Karen’s clit, and the woman stiffened under her, holding her breath. Even her ass quivered around Laci’s finger. At last, with cry that dissolved into a moan, Karen released. Her body shuddered, then tensed again. Up, up, up, body arching, breathing in short, sharp gasps, she released again, then again.

When Karen finally slumped on the bed, Laci pulled her finger from the woman’s ass and scampered up to nuzzle close to her lover. Smiling, she pressed her lips close to Karen’s ear and declared, “I love you Karen, I love you, I love you, I love you. I’ll always love you.”

Karen, her eyes heavy and glazed, smiled and said in a thick voice, “My oh my, that’s about a million I love yous.”

“An’ a million isn’t enough.” Laci raised up to grab the quilt and pull it up over them. She snuggled close enough to Karen that their noses touched.

Karen felt warm and drowsy, and the smell of her own essence on Laci’s chin and mouth had an oddly calming effect. She caressed Laci’s face with the tips of her fingers, and her soft kisses, sweet and tender, caressed her lips. “Let’s do something fun tomorrow,” Karen said in a soft voice. “Do some shopping, have a late lunch, then I thought… Then we could do something like ice skating.”

“Ice skating?” Laci said, puzzled. “I’ve never skated before. I don’t even have a pair of skates.”

Karen chuckled. “You have to learn someday, might as well be with me. We can rent skates. It’ll be fun, and I’ll teach you.”

Laci giggled and shrugged. “Sure, OK, I just don’t wanna embarrass myself.”

“You won’t, not with me there.” Karen nudged Laci onto her back and stroked the plain between her navel and her mound with her fingertips. “Don’t I always take good care of you?”

Laci closed her eyes and shivered. She lifted her mound, offering herself to Karen. “Yes,” she whispered. “You do.”